Year 3 week 26

25th June – 1st July 2018

This week I have been trying to cut down on my food intake. When I set myself this challenge I knew it was going to be hard. All I kept thinking about was how hard it was for me last time in January 2016.

Back then I ate so little food. The food I did eat was protein, fruit and vegetables and very little of anything else. I remember I went from eating junk constantly to eating really healthy with a 5 hour break in-between each meal. I remember it was quite a major shock to my system. So much so that I was fit for nothing.

I spent most of my time in bed without the energy to get up. If I did get up I was so shaky. The hunger pains were so intense that I am sure they could hear the rumbles next door.

My life back then consisted of eating very little and sleeping a lot – I couldn’t physically do anything else.

Remembering what I went through then is very off putting now. Last time I did that out of desperation to lose weight and have more energy to keep up with the kids. However I have definitely got the energy to keep up with the kids now. I know I still have a lot of weight to lose but that desperation has gone.

I have this week though managed to cut down considerably. I don’t know how I have managed to do it because I thought my willpower was non existent. I have been eating mainly protein, fruit and veg and I haven’t found it as hard as I thought.

I have felt a little weak at times and on the very odd occasion shaky. It has however been nothing like it was before. I have even managed to exercise a few times this week too.

There has been one drawback though and that is I haven’t lost any weight at all – I just don’t get it. I know I am thinner though because I can feel it. It’s a good job I no longer concentrate on the scales!


Year 2 week 24

11th – 17th June 2017

The other day I was driving and Matt was in the passenger seat. We had just been shopping and Matt decided that he wanted to try on one of his new shirts. 

He found it quite a struggle putting it on in the car. Once he had got it on he thought that there was something wrong. He realised he was now totally entangled in the seat belt and he was trapped and couldn’t move. 

My first thought, was not to help him or pull over – it was to laugh hysterically.  The only trouble with this was that I laughed so hard that tears were filling my eyes and I couldn’t see. Which was not a good situation when driving. 

I eventually managed to control myself  fortunately without having an accident. Matt eventually managed to untangle himself without any help from me. 

I told him that I had actually done that before and I soon realised that changing while in the car is something you must never do.  It got me thinking about other things that you shouldn’t try and do as you will see below. 

This week has been quite a busy week for me. This week I have had 4 parties to go to.  I have always been a person who loves a good party, but 4 in one week can take its toll. 

3 of the parties have been black tie events 

It’s nice to dress up on occasions and have a good night out and I have to say I enjoyed them all. At this type of event you get to meet people you haven’t seen in a long time, it’s a good time to catch up, wear out your feet on the dance floor and eat good food. 

Last week I also decided to start a detox. Detoxing, I have learnt, is a really good thing to do. So this week I have also learnt that you shouldn’t do it with so many events coming up. 

The trouble with a black tie do is that it’s a set menu and you don’t get to choose what you can eat. The fact that I was detoxing meant that I was extra hungry by the time the food came. This meant that the detox went out the window.

I was also staying in a lot of nice hotels, which also meant a lot of nice food. It was like I was really trying to punish myself. The thing that crossed my mind was who in the world would ever start a detox with so many events coming up. 

I thought I would not be able to get back on the detox after. However I did and I actually lost a few pounds this week too.  But I wouldn’t recommend it – neither would I recommend changing shirts in a car with your seat belt on!

Year 2 week 15

9th – 15th April 2017

Training for the half marathon in Rwanda is well under way. I am managing to get out at least 3 times a week and averaging at least 12 miles a week running. 

It has caused a problem. With all the extra running means I am ending up extra hungry which means I am eating extra food. 

One of the rules I am finding hard to keep is only eating my meals and not eating for 5 hours between my meals. 

Last year I spent half of the year hungry and I seemed to cope with it ok. Now the hunger seems to get to me a bit more. I don’t know if it’s because I have lost my motivation or because the extra exercise is making me hungry. 

The good thing is that I have noticed it and I can now start reeling it back in.

I am finding the training pretty tough. I am not a runner and I have not, in recent years, ran 12 metres a week let alone 12 miles. I have still got a long way to go and a lot more miles to put in before I go to Rwanda in less than a months time. 

I have never trained for anything in my life before. I am starting to wonder if I can do it at all. I think it is going to be the hardest thing I have ever done. The more I train the tireder I am getting and the more I am doubting my ability. 

One thing that keeps me going is knowing I am going to be helping children out of poverty – it makes every step worth the effort.

Day 263

Monday 19th September 2016. 

Today is a new day and the fact that I got to my initial goal of 70lbs yesterday was perfect timing. 

I feel now that I can start again. My next big goal now is to lose 30lbs by new year.  So now is the time when I need to move onto the next chapter. 

I have been planning for a while to do another detox. I have always had it in my diary to start it today. That’s why it’s perfect timing. 

So I am back on day 1 all I can remember from the detox last time was that it was really hard, I was extremely hungry and I had a few major meltdowns. 

I am hoping I cope a lot better than last time. On phase 1 I have 3 meals a day and they can consist of either fruit for each meal, vegetables for each meal or potatoes for each meal. 

Last time I had fruit the first day and potatoes the 2nd. The potato day was the worst day ever – I don’t think I am going to eat potato wedges ever again. The fruit day wasn’t so bad though. 

So today I ate only fruit. I had apples for breakfast, mangos for lunch and melon for dinner. I have been alright – there were times when I got hunger pains and the feeling of being lightheaded.

All in all I have coped quite well. That was until it came to picking the kids up from school. I got the first 2 ok then one son was so late arriving which made me late for the next one. When I went to get him, he wasn’t there at all. Which sent me on a wild goose chase looking for him. I finally heard that he was getting a lift home sometime later. I really wasn’t best pleased. 

Today wasn’t the best day for the kids to try my patience. When you are hungry it doesn’t take much to send you off on one.  

I however have got through the day without giving into temptation. I think a lot of relaxation is required though for the rest of the day.

Start weight 21st 5lbs

16st 5lbs.      ⬅️➡️.   . 70lbs⬇️total

Start weight 136.5kg

103.9kg.        ⬅️➡️.      32.6kg⬇️total

Day 149

Saturday 28th May 2016

I am trying to stick to the 8 rules while I have been in London. It has been really difficult. 

For the first 2 nights there was a set menu. The food I ate was good for my diet but it did come out after 9pm which meant it was one rule broken. 

Last night we went to the theatre to watch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. This meant that I would have had to break the 5 hour rule and eat before the show or eat after 9pm again. 

I decided to miss my dinner instead. I did have an apple in my bag so I ate that. Eventhough the show was great it was the worst one to see when you are hungry!

Jenny told me if you miss a meal you can’t make up for it the next meal. 

So when breakfast came this morning I ate my normal breakfast. All I wanted was more. 

I felt like I was in that scene in Oliver Twist when he asks for more. I, however, had Jenny in my head saying “more, you want more!” (Mr Bumbles reply to Oliver) So I was good and I didn’t give into temptation.  

No weigh in

Day 103

Tuesday 12th April 2016

While I was on holiday my uncle told me a story about 2 groups of people. Both were given the same cake and half way through eating it group 1 was told the cake was 600 calories a slice while group 2 was told 100 calories a slice. Later that afternoon they split them up into the same groups again, and gave them the same cake. He then asked me what happened I said that group 2 ate the cake and group 1 didn’t. However the total opposite happened. Group 2 thought they had done well that day and didn’t want to ruin anything, whereas group 1 thought they have already blown their diet that day so they may as well go for it and eat the second cake. 

It’s called :-

Since coming back from my holiday I have been really hungry wanting to eat at funny times. I was also so strong on holiday that when I got back my will power went for about 10 minutes at the wrong time. Temptation got the better of me and I ate a part of one of the kids Easter egg. It tasted so good!

Even though I gave into temptation I have decided I am NOT going to give into this catastrophic thinking!

18st 2.2lbs.    1.3lbs⬇️.    44.8lbs⬇️total

115.3kg.            0.6kg⬇️.     21.2kg⬇️total

Day 31

Sunday 31st January 2016

Day 4 of detox

I am still eating food I don’t like, but I am going to persevere with it in the hope that I do get to like it.

By late morning I got very giddy and shaky and I couldn’t shake it off, not even after lunch. I was so bad at lunch time that I cried my way through it. I just couldn’t cope any more.

Had to go to bed in the afternoon but I was really struggling. I got to the stage where I wanted to quit I thought I would tell Jenny the nutritionist so I called her.

She said that I am doing really well and to keep going and that what I am feeling is natural because at the minute all the glucose is coming out of my liver and the shakes are like me going through cold turkey. She said tomorrow would be better.

So I didn’t quit.

After dinner a was a little better.

20st 3.7lbs.    1lb⬇️.     15.3lbs⬇️total😫😂😭

Day 29

Friday 29th January 2016

Day 2 of detox, I had a choice today I could eat veg all day, fruit all day or potatoes all day. I stupidly picked potatoes. I love them and I thought that they would fill me up more than the other choices.

How wrong was I. Potatoes with no oil on are really disgusting.

I went out for the day packed lunch in hand. By the time I ate my lunch they were cold. Cold potatoes were even worse.

When evening came around I couldn’t cope any more I had a major meltdown.

I was ready to quit it all. I just thought that I didn’t want to be thin and miserable, but fat and happy.

All I knew is that I couldn’t eat another potato. So I cheated and ate eggs instead. I will be allowed eggs tomorrow anyway. Even though I cheated I didn’t feel it was bad, it’s not like I ate a big chocolate cake.

20st  5.9lbs.   2.2lbs⬇️.   13.1lbs ⬇️total😫

Day 28

Thursday 28th January 2016

Today was the first day of the detox that the nutritionist gave me. I had a bad stomach until tea time so it didn’t really bother me at all.

I ate fruit at meal times and I had to eat nothing in between for 5 hours.

Breakfast x 3 bananas

Lunch x 3 apples

Dinner x 1 whole melon

By the evening  I couldn’t really concentrate. I ended up going to bed early because I was so hungry.

20st 8.1lbs.    0.2lbs⬆️.   7..9lbs⬇️total 😟🍌🍌🍌🍏🍎🍏🍉🍉🍉🍉🍉🍉

Day 12

Tuesday 12th January 2016

I felt as if I was trying really hard and to see the scales go up really did upset me, I said that when it happened I wouldn’t let it bother me but I couldn’t help myself and the tears just started to fall.

I am pre menopausal which is making my hormones go all over the place.

Went for a morning walk which cheered me up no end.

I felt really hungry today.

21st 1.6lbs.  0.4 lbs⬆️.  3.4lbs ⬇️total 😭