Year 2 week 32

6th – 12th August 2017

In some stages of my life I have suffered with depression. It has usually been when I have tried to lose weight and failed. 

Depression is something that comes on so gradually that you hardly notice you’re getting it. Once it has got hold of you it’s like  you still don’t notice that you have it – it’s the people around you that notice and they are the ones that suffer. 

For me, when I had it, I didn’t want to do anything. I would sit on the sofa all day and do nothing other than watch films. Jobs that needed to be done around the house just didn’t get done because I couldn’t be bothered. Any slight little issue that cropped up I just couldn’t deal with it, I would end up in tears not knowing how to sort it out. It usually meant that Matt sorted it out for me. My kids have learnt to become very domesticated, which is great now,  but I am sure at the time it wasn’t fair on them. 

This may sound really stupid but depression was a place, at the time, I think I was happy to be in while I was living it and I didn’t have the desire to leave. Thankfully, now I am not there anymore, I see it as a place I do not want to go back to. 

Over the last 18 months I feel I have found a remedy – it’s called exercise. If I think back some of my most happiest times is when I have been doing exercises. Training for my half marathon in Rwanda was one of the hardest things physically I have had to do, but mentally it was a release from all that negativity in my life. It also gave me purpose – something to aim for. 

We have been very lucky because we have room in our house for a gym. It is a place I have been a lot over the past 18 months. However over the past 2 months we have decided to renovate our house and our gym is no more. Well that is until the work is completed. 

I have not done too much exercise since coming back from Rwanda. Partly because we have been away a lot and partly because we have no gym.

I do like exercising outdoors but I like to go with other people. But the days I plan to go it always seems to be raining. 

Exercising in the rain is not much fun. I have never been a person who is really proactive when it comes to exercise so l struggle to go on my own – especially if it’s raining!

I have to admit that over the last few weeks I have been getting slightly down. It can only be the lack of exercise. This week though I have tried to be a bit more proactive and get myself back out there. 

I have managed to do a few bike rides and some walks. I have not started the running back up but I will soon. I have to say it’s worked and cheered me up no end. That’s probably because the weather has been nice as well. 

So I never thought I would ever say this but I can’t wait for the gym to be finished so I can start running again and not have to go out in the rain! 


Day 211

Friday 29th July 2016

Today is our last day at our villa in France, but before we get packing I wanted to do one final bike ride. 

Even though I have been on a few bike rides this holiday I haven’t done one with the whole family, which was one of my goals.

However we have come away with only 3 of my 4 kids. My eldest did not come this year. Which means I couldn’t totally fulfill my goal. 

So today I went cycling with Matt and my 3 sons

A lot of fun was had by all. I really enjoyed seeing the kids enjoying themselves. They would spend most of their time overtaking each other and then giggle as they got the lead. 

What made it extra special was that I would never have had that time with the kids if I had kept on the road I was going down before. 

I am getting so many benefits everyday from my new life. I just wish I did it sooner so I could have done more activities with the kids while they were growing up.

No weigh in

Day 196

Thursday 14th July 2016

Started the day this morning at 3am. We spent the day in the car driving to France 16 hours later we arrived at our first destination where we will be staying for a few days. 

Our main summer holiday every year is usually somewhere we can drive to as Matt likes to take his bike. 

I have been married for 20 years this year and this is the first year ever that I have taken a bike too. 

We always pick a holiday destination in the hills as Matt loves to cycle up them. The harder the hill the better it is for him. I however don’t think that I will cope with that too much. But I have to admit that I am looking forward to riding especially because the kids have also brought there bikes. 

One of the things I said I wanted to do at the beginning of the year was to do more activities with the family. This is definitely a goal that hopefully I will accomplish this holiday. 

No weigh in today. 

Day 163

Saturday 11th June 2016

One of the things I said at the beginning of the year was that I really wanted to  have the ability to do more things together as a family. 

Last year I couldn’t even go half a day without having to go to bed. With the weight loss and healthy eating I have found that I have so much more energy

Matt is very into his cycling and for a while now I have wanted to get a bike. I haven’t ridden a bike on the road for about 25 years. 

I have always loved elephants – I think it’s because I can relate to their size and the reason I haven’t ridden a bike for so long is because that’s how I felt I looked like when I was on one.

Today I bought a bike and I went on my first ride. 

Yes, I even wore the very flattering cycling outfit. It wasn’t the case of all the gear and no idea. It was a case of all the gear and ABSOLUTELY no idea. I had a really good teacher though as Matt came with me 

We didn’t go out for long but I did have a few hills to conquer. 

6 months ago you would have never seen me on a bike and look at me now. I was actually quite nervous before I went out but now I can’t wait for my next ride.

I know it’s a small achievement but great things can happen when you take the first step. This was definitely my first step. Looking forward to where it takes me.

Start weight 21st 5lbs

17st 1.6lbs.       0.4lbs⬆️      59.4lbs⬇️total

Start weight 135.6 kg

108.7kg.          0.2kg⬆️.      27.9kg⬇️total

Day 144

Monday 23rd May 2016

Matt my husband loves cycling. He goes a few times a week and cycles about 70 miles when he goes. He loves it. 

One of my goals is to go cycling with him. I however will not be going 70 miles but it would be nice to go a little way. 

Jenny wanted me to try out her personal trainer for a few sessions. Today was the first one. 

I went to the gym where he worked.  I got to try out some of the gym equipment. He certainly put me through my paces. 

I got to use an exercise bike. I have not been on a bike for years. Okay, so it wasn’t a proper road bike, but I really enjoyed it. 

So all I need to do now is buy a bike! 

Start weight 21st 5lbs

17st 4.8lbs. 0.3lbs⬆️.    56.2lbs⬇️total

Start weight 135.6kg

110.1kg.       0.1kg⬆️.      26.5kg⬇️total