Day 257

Tuesday 13th September 2016

Today is one of those days that I shouldn’t have even bothered to get out of bed.

Every Tuesday I have a few ladies over and we spend the day sewing.  We sit and chat and we help each other with our projects. One lady I have taught to sew and make quilts and cushions. She has now made quite a few but on the odd occasion she needs some advice. 

I am the one who can do it and I just get on with it. Not today though – everything went wrong. I ruined a t-shirt I was taking in and my sewing machine broke down a few times. It got to lunch time and by then I had given up. I am usually a person who never gives up. 

Today though I have totally lost my mojo. It’s been parcelled up and sent to someone who can us it more wisely than me. 

It even took me a few attempts at my drawing today. 

I don’t know why I feel like that because I should be happy I have lost weight 2 days in a row. That hasn’t happened for so long that I couldn’t believe it when I got on the scales. 

Eventhough I have lost my mojo my willpower has still remained. Which is amazing as normally when I feel like that I eat for comfort. Today though I stayed strong and stuck to my healthy eating plan. 

So if you have got my mojo please send it back. Hopefully I will have it again tomorrow. 

Start weight 21st 5lbs

16st 6.6lbs.  0.4lbs⬇️.  68.4lbs⬇️total

Start weight 136.5kg

104.6kg.       0.2kg⬇️.       31.9kg⬇️total


Day 230

Wednesday  17th August 2016

The last few days have been really busy. I did the 23 mile bike ride and then we went to Chester for a few days where I did a lot of walking. 

This morning I woke up and I was so tired I felt like I have been living life in the fast lane with no fuel in the tanks.

I loved my 23 mile bike ride. I felt like I really accomplished something. I was even more happy that I didn’t ache but have been quite tired since. 

Chester was nice too, all my walking was really walking around the shops and of course I loved that too. 

All this though has taken its toll and today I just wanted to rest but I didn’t. I spent the day tidying up, which, if you knew me, is totally out of character.  I am such an untidy person and I don’t tidy up unless I have to – especially in a room that no one sees like my bedroom. 

So today was very unusual because I tidied up when I didn’t need to and I did it when I was really tired. That’s a new one even for me. 

I have noticed too that I have been a lot more hungry than normal. I have just wanted to eat at times when I can’t. I still feel that I am quite motivated so I really don’t want to break the rules. I have still managed to go 5 hours without eating but the last few days has been hard. 

This is probably one of the reasons that I am tired lately because I am using my energy quicker than I can replace it. 

I hope this will correct itself soon before my motivation goes. It hasn’t solved my problem at the moment though because I am still really tired and hungry.

Start weight 21st 5lbs

16st 8.4lbs.      ⬅️➡️.      66.6lbs⬇️total

Start weight 136.5kg

105.4kg.         ⬅️➡️.       31.9kg⬇️total

Day 207

Monday 25th July 2016

I always knew before I left for this holiday  that I would find it really difficult. I knew that my food choices were going to be hard. I knew the kids would be eating pizza, burgers, chips, ice cream and bread, pastries and croissants from the bakery. 

Since being on the holiday all that is true but I think it is worse than I expected. Normally I wouldn’t find it a problem because with my healthy eating I would be losing weight. This holiday I am still eating really healthily but I am putting on weight. I don’t understand why because I have done nothing to make this happen. When I see the scales go up I just try even harder. But then the scales go up again. 

I have to admit that it has really got to me. It makes me want to take a hammer to the scales. 

I texted Jenny because I was upset this was her response 

“You are doing nothing wrong do not panic, it’s just all those little things add up and you add the heat to the situation, bit of bloating it’s just your liver storing things, it will only be 3/4 lbs and they will easily drop off as soon as you get home. Keep enjoying yourself, the freedom, flavours and the holiday, a few lbs does not matter when you are feeling this good, trust yourself xx”

It made me feel better. But I have come to some conclusions 

1) I am not going to use the scales for the rest of the holiday because they are depressing me. 

2) I am going to remember how far I have come in a short period of time. 

And 3) I am going to remember what it was like after my last holiday when I didn’t really see my true weight until 3-5 days after my holiday when my body settled down again. 

So I have decided not to worry, enjoy my holiday but still keep eating the way I am because I am not doing nothing wrong. 

Start weight 21st 5lbs

16st 12.1lbs.    0.3lbs⬆️.   62.9lbs⬇️total

Start weight 136.5kg

107.1kg.     0.1kg⬆️.      29.4kg⬇️total

Day 145

Tuesday 24th May 2016

I have heard the saying “I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders” many times. 

Today hasn’t been a bad day as everything has run smoothly. So why does it feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. 

When I feel like that usually I would sit and wollow in self pity. When you don’t feel yourself it is really hard thinking about healthy eating, diets and normality. 

However, as I am drawing my feelings everyday and today I drew the world on my shoulders it got me thinking. WHY ?

Why do I feel like that ? 

It could be because I am busier than normal, it could be because its exam season and I could be worried about the kids exams.  It could be hay fever! It could also be because I am feeling a bit run down, it could be a whole number of things. 

But I have come to the conclusion that really I don’t have the weight of the world on my shoulders – I am just tired and I need to go to bed. 

I find things really difficult to cope with when I am tired so I have decided to take my own advice and go to bed.

Goodnight !!

Start weight 21st 5lbs

17st 4lbs.    0.8lbs⬇️       57lbs⬇️total

Start weight 135.6 kg

109.8kg.    0.3kg⬇️.        26.8kg⬇️total

Day 79

Saturday 19th March 2016

Weekends are so different than in the week. I find it a lot harder to exercise so I have missed my walk today.

When I eat food, Jenny tells me to take an apple cider vinegar tablet before hand. It’s good for breaking down the fats.

I take a tablet but you can also drink it or put it on salad.

18st 8.8lbs.       0.4lbs⬇️      38.2lbs⬇️ total

Day 77

Thursday 17th March 2016

I was having a life group at my house today so I got out the biscuits, and its the first time in a long time that this bothered me.

I have had people really interested in my diet asking how I am doing it. One question that keeps coming up is why can’t I have milk because I need it for the calcium and strengthening my bones.

When I saw Jenny yesterday I asked about this, she said there is so much more calcium in the vegetables I am eating than you can get in a whole carton of milk.

I went walking with mum today she wanted to go a different route than just around the block. It was a nice change.

18st 9.7lbs.    1.1lbs⬇️.    37.3lbs ⬇️total


Day 71

Friday 11th March 2016

Had another training session today, it was the first time I got my boxing gloves out since the detox.

I feel like I have lost a lot of my power. I don’t seem to have the energy that I had when I was consuming more calories.

I felt a little disheartened today as my weight really is not budging at all. I went out for a healthy meal for dinner. A change of scenery and new flavours really did help.

19st 0.8lbs.   ⬅️➡️.   32.2lbs⬇️total

Day 69

Wednesday 9th March 2016

I can see a pattern forming. One day up the next day down ⬆️⬇️⬆️⬇️

I seem to have stopped losing weight and can’t seem to get under 19 stone. I just need to try harder. I am still on just over 1000 calories a day, so I can’t cut down on food any more. I also exercise almost every day, I don’t know what else to do.

I have been trying to drink more water because I know I have not been having enough. I am hoping it might help as I have been slacking in that area for a while.
19st 1lbs.   0.5lbs⬆️.    32lbs⬇️total

Day 65

Saturday 5th March 2016

I am starting feel really weak and washed out. I feel like I am on the spin cycle in the washing machine.

I was really hungry again today, it starting to get just too hard. I am also really bored.

Good job it is treat day tomorrow or I might be giving up right now.

19st 2.5lbs.     0.5lbs⬇️.    30.5lbs⬇️total