8th – 14th January 2017
This week has been a really bad week for me. I have had a bad cold and the first few days I was in bed. Then the cold seemed to clear and I felt a lot better except my ears were really blocked.
I find when your ears are blocked it can send your balance out and it really did with me. I would try and walk down the corridor but I was going completely in the wrong direction. I couldn’t seem to correct it and go the right way.
All week I have been hitting walls and cabinets and the room has done nothing but spin. It has taken me a lot longer to get to where I wanted to go. It’s like something is pulling me back.
I feel that is how my motivation has gone too. I am struggling to stay on track. I want to head one way but there’s this voice in my head that says “your year is up you don’t have to do this anymore” and this is trying to make me go backwards. I am fighting against it – but to no avail sometimes.
I am hoping it’s only because I have a cold and my motivation will come back when it’s gone. The cold has made me feel extremely hungry as well this week.
I have managed to not eat between my meals and wait 5 hours till I can eat again. But I think that my portion sizes have been a little larger than they should be.
I have not been able to exercise all week either which has been very frustrating. I have wanted to exercise but didn’t feel I could.
One thing this cold has taught me is that I need to start measuring my food again, to get my portion sizes back on track. I have stopped weighing my food for about 6 months.
I think my portion size has generally been ok but I think to measure again would not hurt. It would be like starting from the beginning again. All I remember is being very motivated at the very beginning so hopefully by me weighing my food and being back in control of what I eat I will boost my motivation.
I am also planning to up the exercise again. I am going to try and do at least 30 minutes everyday. Some days I already do an hour but exercising all the others days for at least 30 mins will hopefully get me back on track.
Last year when I was writing my thoughts down everyday and sharing it on this blog helped me keep my goals at the forefront of my mind. I found it really helpful and I managed to focus on where I was heading better.
This year, without me writing my thoughts down everyday, has seemed to make it harder for some reason. To write and draw a picture everyday for a year really did take a lot out of me. It did however stop me from thinking about food and made me think how I was to achieve my goals instead.
To keep up that pace everyday is not sustainable for long – I am surprised how I managed it for a year! I do need to find something else to keep me focused though. Maybe it will come in time.